Христос Воскрес!



Yesterday we celebrated Easter, and it was a wonderful celebration! After church, we joined about five families at the Stemples' house. The boys enjoyed the wide open spaces of their house and yard--the weather was in the mid 60s for the first time, and playing with many friends. Eric and I also enjoyed spending time with friends that we don't get to see enough. Ella and I left early to go nap--they live only a 10 minute bus ride away, so that was perfect for me, as well--the perfect mix of socializing and resting!


(Josh Stemple shared his drawer of lego's. Do all boys wear sweater vests for Easter?)

(Lev Brovko liked to pull Ella off the mini-trampoline.)

We've had a rough week of sickness, but hopefully we're pulling out of it now. It's been kind of weird, Eric's allergies have really bad. He always has itchy eyes and sneezes during the summer, but it's been much worse this year. Almost every evening, he has itchy eyes and coughing spells. On Friday, he scratched the surface of his eye, and ended up with scary swelling. Fortunately, our medical friends assured us that his eye wouldn't burst! The swelling was better by morning, though it didn't go away entirely until later that day. We still don't know what exactly caused the reaction--was it some pollen or dust or something else he encountered while out that afternoon?
Of course, it didn't help that while his eyes were swelling out of his head, we had six children to take care of! That night we babysat Scott and Victoria Andes' kids--ages Diana, 5, Amy, 7, and Nathan, 7. (A few weeks ago, the boys stayed the night at their home so I could go to a weekend conference.) The kids were a handful, but fun. They slept in sleeping bags, and we decided to have Ella sleep in our room.



Ella has also been sick this week, with a mild fever and rash. She also got her immunizations and two finger/toe pricks to check her iron--though the hemoglobin meter turned out to be broken. Having her fussy all week made me realize how good we have it usually! All she wanted was to be carried all day. She has continued to nap well, most days. At night she's sleeping okay, though not through the night anymore. She is still fussy during her waking hours. I started eating eggs (appropriate for Easter, I thought) but haven't introduced anything new to her this week. As soon as we get her iron checked, I'm going to test her with dairy, and see if she really is allergic.


We are excited to have Eric back home, for three solid weeks! I think he’s felt the strain of the 6 trips in two months even more than I have. In fact, the last few trips, I was amazed with how well we did. I didn’t get a lot of ‘extras’ done, but I had energy for all the things I needed to do. I didn’t start the trip dreading it, and I counted the days only because the boys asked so often. But I didn’t have the dragging, “How am I going to make it __ more days?” feel. Our routines feel sustainable. It helps that Ella is napping longer. So suddenly, I have an extra half an hour each morning for homeschooling, and we’re keeping up with the curriculum. Most days, she’s napping twice for 1 ½ hours, and sometimes even two hours! Her nighttimes are okay—we had four days in a row when she slept from 11-7 without crying. But then the last week, she’s back to waking once a night.


I have about 14 hours of babysitting each week, but I’m thinking of reducing our babysitter to only three mornings 11 hours) It seems that Tima is still acting out a lot—both in disobedience to me and also anger toward Danya. And Ella is definitely in need of extra attention and discipline, especially at meal times. Unfortunately, all I get done with the babysitting time that I have is usually to go running 2-3 times a week, a few errands, and a prayer meeting via conference call. But I’m learning to be more disciplined about using my time for things (like updating you!) that I really want to do more often.


Danya

Eric has started reading The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe and Danya is very enamored. He begs for more after each chapter. Last night at bedtime, Eric promised that he would read another chapter this morning. So, at 7:00, Danya came into our room, “Daddy, it’s 7, so can you read the next chapter?” He’s enjoyed the chapter books that we read for school, as well. He doesn’t really like his ‘reader’ book, which has pretty silly stories. I think he’d like it a lot better if I read them all to him, instead of insisting that Danya does the reading. He’s doing a good job, sounding out most words, and learning a few new sight words. I am so grateful for his fall semester in kindergarten, because he really understands how to read, but just needs practice. Danya also loves the science books, often asking to read extra pages when he finds interesting pictures. Right now, we’re studying plants, and enjoying planting our own seeds, and observing bean seeds sprouting in a jar. (Though I chose my major to avoid the course titled, The Flowering Plant, I’m enjoying it, and learning a lot, too!)

Danya has a seemingly intuitive grasp of addition. He rarely counts on his fingers, or uses the techniques that the book encourages for learning addition. He’s memorized some addition facts, and refers to them in his mind in order to figure out problems that he doesn’t know. He’s learning to do the same with 10’s.

Because of the demands of school, chores, and even being 'forced' to play outside, Danya and Tima really love having time to play. It's worked out that they have individual play time each day --Danya during the afternoon naps, and Tima during school. But most of the time, as soon as we come home, or finish school, I hear, "Tima, want to play?" And they run off to their room and play with toys for as long as I let them. Of course they have conflicts, but the last few weeks, it seems they are doing well at resolving them quickly and well. What I usually hear when they are upset is, "Fine. I'm not going to play with you anymore." (And then there's the, "Stop, Stop! Teeee-maah! Ouch!" that isn't a good sign!)


Tima

Tima: “I’m going to tell you a joke. I’m going to stick my water cup…to the door. Ha ha ha! Isn’t that silly?”

Tima’s make-believe world is expanding. He has so much trouble deciding what to pretend to be, so he’s started ‘layering’ them on (even when he doesn’t have a costume).
“Mom, pretend that I’m Larry Boy, but inside, I’m still Dot.” (That’s from ‘Bug’s life’)
“Pretend I have my Dash costume on, but under it, I am super monkey, and my clothes are my fur.” (Super monkey is entirely his own creation.)
Sometimes there are three or four, including a lion, a baby, Manny (praying mantis from ‘Bug’s life’) and Superman of course.


Ella

I mentioned above that Ella is needing more discipline. Lately, we’ve been frustrated with how out of control she is. This is very concerning at mealtime, as we’ve let her get away with a lot of behaviors that we never should have! (Shrieking and pointing at what she wants, batting away the spoon to refuse what she doesn’t want, grabbing the spoon from us.) I was feeling pretty hopeless, wondering if I need to read about ‘the strong-willed child’ and prepare for a few years of daily battles. But I picked up a few books at a friend’s house, one which I’ve read before, Shepherding a Child’s heart, and another Train up a Child that is new to me. While I don’t agree with all the authors’ methods, it has given me hope that we can teach Ella (and the boys for that matter!) to act more appropriately. I decided to get strict with Ella about how she asks for things. When she points and screeches, I show her the sign for ‘please’ and say, “Say please.” The first day I thought we were getting nowhere. But I held out a long time in each situation, not giving her what she was screaming for. (I usually finally forced her hand to do the sign, and gave it to her.) The second day, she started signing, “Please” for everything she wanted, often without me even telling her to. And I’ve noticed in other situations that although she has a very angry and loud reaction to any discipline, she seems to quickly stop the undesired behavior. So, that gives me hope to hold firm through the wailing, knowing that she has a teachable heart. And I find it very true, as both books claim, that 100% consistency on my part is key, for all the kids. It’s hard to discipline myself to not threaten and warn the boys when they aren’t obeying. But instead, when I punish them the first time, then I don’t get exasperated and angry.

Ella’s really enjoying walking. I would say she walks 90% of the time around the apartment, with great hand flourishes to balance. A big help for me is that she’s learned to safely get down from beds and couches. That was one of the first things she responded to, about a month ago, where I could really see her learning. I just say, “Feet first” if she’s heading for a fall, and she turns herself around without a problem. She still doesn’t understand how to safely maneuver from a crawling position to sitting—she’s often in danger of sitting down off the edge and falling backwards.

I suppose it was three months ago when I first saw her pick up a pencil and then make drawing motions on the paper. Now she’s really mimicking using objects for their real purposes. She loves the magnetic drawing board, though she doesn’t draw much with crayons or pencils. She uses any long rectangle as a phone. The trains, cars, airplanes zoom around. And the animals all bounce along, usually saying, “ooh-ooh” which is her dog bark noise. Ella’s favorite books are Brown Bear and God Made Me (which has pictures of noses, eyes, feet, hands, etc.) She loves to turn the pages, and open the flaps of books that have them. She sits fairly patiently for the boys’ books, too, although once she is tired of them, it’s good to have a board book nearby for her to flip through.
Bedtime questions: There is a series of five questions that I ask the boys each night. And they’ve learned the correct answers, almost:
1) Do you know how much I love you?
[So much.]
2) Do you know how long I’ll love you?
[Forever.]
3) Do you know why I love you?
[Because I’m your son]
4) Do you know what can change that?
[Nothing.]
5) Do you know how precious you are?
[I can’t even imagine!]

Danya’s started getting more creative, saying in response to 1) or 5): “From the middle of the earth to the middle of the sun to the middle of Pluto and back to the sun.”

But Tima can’t remember how to answer the 3rd question. He pauses, then says, “Because you’re my son.” We’re working on it, but even right after I have him practice the right way, if I ask the question again, he reverses it…and laughs.

When I forget, they beg, saying, “You forgot to ask me the questions!” And it’s amazing how the last one always brings a smile to their faces.

______________________________________________

We found the tooth. It was out in our common-entry, and we were fortunate that nobody had swept it up! It’s kind of gross. I guess I’ll keep it. Tell me, you experienced parents… now that your kids are grown, are you glad you kept those little relics? Do you ever go look at them fondly? Or are they packed away never to be seen again?

First lost tooth



"Tima was tackling me. And then, he sat on me and then he fell off me. And then my tooth got knocked out. I didn't even notice that my tooth wasn't there. And then we got in the elevator and when we got outside, I felt that the tooth wasn't there."


During the course of this dictation, I [Kara] understood that the tooth is not outside, but in our apartment! Danya says, "In the hall, probably." Hopefully, Ella hasn't eaten it already.

Tima

Tima has a few favorite Russian phrases:

Тетя Клава, Смотри! (Auntie Klava, Watch!)
Я не знаю. (I don’t know.)
He also says good morning and goodbye, and a lot of other words. I hear him practicing counting a lot to himself.

He has a lot of trouble adapting to our babysitter. He doesn’t understand a lot, and ignores her most of the time. Which is a problem when she’s telling him to get dressed, or to do something differently on the playground. And, there are a lot of things she says to do differently on the playground!
Don’t sit.
Don’t lay down in the sand.
Don’t jump off the merry-go-round.
Don’t take off your hat.
Don’t take off your coat.
Don’t touch that, it’s dirty.
It must be hard to be three years old and have all the rules change. (My favorite rule at Danya’s preschool in Irkustk was “Don’t run. You’ll get all sweaty.”)
Finally, we’ve convinced Tima (through rewards and punishments, and reminders every day before I leave) that it’s worth his time to obey his babysitter. And it turns out that he does understand a lot!


A lot of snow fell our last day in Finland. And we let Tima eat the snow. The look of joy on his face was beautiful. He didn’t want to sled, dig or play. He just ate and ate and ate. That evening as we boarded our flight? Tima said, “I don’t want to go back to ‘kraine.”
“Why not?”
“I want to stay here where I can eat the snow.”
A few times, he’s mentioned that again. And he’s talked about “when we go to our other home,” which when pressed, he says is in Russia. I’m not sure if he’s picturing our home in Colorado or perhaps even where we stayed in Finland. But somehow I doubt he’s talking about Irkutsk! Usually he talks about flying there with his wings, so I think it’s a pretty imaginary scenario.

Speaking of wings, he’s in love with the Dot character from the movie, Bug’s Life. I don’t know what it is, but he just wants to pretend to be her all the time, so that he can fly. Both boys don’t want to be Flick, the main character, since he doesn’t have wings. And they know that they can’t be Princess Ada, since she’s a girl. Danya wants to be the praying mantis, Manny, in theory, but it’s not like he really pretends to be him. But Dot is young enough to not have a strong gender association, I guess.

Tima: Mom.
Me: Yes.
Tima: Say, “Yes, Dot.”
Me: Yes, Dot.
Tima: My wings aren’t grown in yet, so I can’t fly.
Me: Okay, Dot.

(a minute later)

Tima: Mom.
Me: Yes.
Tima: Say, “Yes, Dot.”
Me: Yes, Dot.
Tima: Now I can fly!
Me: Okay, Dot.
Tima: Want to see me fly for real?
Me: Yes, Dot.
[And then he gallops about with a little skipping step and ‘flits’ about.]

Danya



After playing one morning with our babysitter’s son, he described how he blocked Oleg’s goal. “I turned out to be a good soccer player!”
Russian language, is progressing. Danya is very bold and not afraid of making mistakes. In fact, the phrase he uses the most is wrong. And though he’s corrected a lot, he doesn’t seem to change to the correct form. “Я хочешь....” Which is an incorrect verb form--like saying “I wants …”



Danya is very into building with real LEGOs. He got a few little kits for his birthday, and he’s very good at following the instructions and building them. With the big Duplo blocks, he loves to make big guns or big spaceships. He spends over an hour each day doing this while his siblings and I nap. Sometimes he plays with his cars, making elaborate family connections, “This is the Daddy, this is the Mommy, this is …” And then the airplanes come and shoot missiles at them. He has started playing with the wooden train tracks again, finally really designing and building them. (Tima likes to push the trains around the elaborate loops and switches. And Ella, unfortunately, likes to shake them apart. Spencer and Annette, your gift keeps on giving. Thomas and friends are now on their third continent!)

Ella



Klaudia Fyodorovna comes four mornings a week to babysit. She and her 11-year-old son, Oleg, also came to Danya's birthday party. (I found out it's a good idea to invite our babysitter to the party, because she played with Ella while I was busy.)



How to quickly describe Ella's development?
Why quickly, because ....

...I started this last week, hoping to do it before we left for a week in Finland. We met our campus leadership team members who drove from St. Petersburg for a relaxing two days together. (Except we are still sad that Cheryl and Lena were not able to come at the last minute. :( We also got year-long Ukrainian visas, since our 90 allowed visa-free days were almost over.

...Ella is changing so fast, and doing new things every day. So if I want to keep a record for myself--which I've always done through these updates--I better write every week!

...I seem to have lost the margin in my life necessary to write every week! I blame the hour I spend homeschooling each morning. That used to be my time for email, shower, rest or anything else. Ella only sleeps for an hour during her two naps, and I use the morning for homeschooling and the afternoon for my nap. So the only free time I have is the evening, which can be easily taken up by dishes, sweeping, reading the Bible, managing the boys' one-more-trip-to-the-bathroom and then Ella cries for her 10:30 feeding and I suddenly realize I need to get to bed! Updating you is important, but not worth losing sleep over! (The bills I haven't been getting to might be another matter, though.)

Her walking has really progressed. Three weeks after her first steps, she is heading off across rooms, down halls with great bravery. And though she rarely makes it to her goal, she is no longer intimidated by wide spaces! She is also very stable, and can stand up easily, or squat down to pick something up or regain her balance. She is getting better at picking up toys or pillows to carry with her. Last week (3/20) she picked up a wet towel in the bathroom and carried it out to me. And this week she discovered the noise two stacking cups make when hit together. Now she loves to pick up two at once and walk around, banging them together.
"Uh-oh"
Ella mimics almost any sound she hears, but 'uh-oh' is her favorite. Last week she started saying it whenever something dropped. It sounded like 'uh-uh' but with the same tone as our 'uh-oh'. And then the boys echo her, and she repeats it over and over. Just yesterday (3/28) she started saying the 'oh' sound at the end. Whenever we cough, sneeze, or she hears a dog bark, she mimics it.




Ella is feeling a better--waking only once per night, though still sometimes fussy during the days. We're still at a loss for what is bothering her. And to add to the mystery, her reflux symptoms increased for about two weeks. She even started spitting up again. But it didn't make her fussier. And now the symptoms have receded. I think that she is less fussy during the days, and napping sometimes a record 1 1/2 hours instead of her usual one.


We've tested a few foods that were low on our suspected-sensitivity list, so now she's eating bananas again, and I'm allowing myself berries and any fruit except apples. I'm still debating whether to test her with apples, dairy, or maybe just whether I can eat eggs or almonds. An American doctor here is going to help us evaluate what's going on, but she's pretty busy, so we haven't been able to talk yet. At this point, I'm hoping that all of her January fussiness was due to her molars and not any food sensitivities!


Happy Birthday to Danya!




On March 13th, Danya turned 6. Wow!


We invited all of the friends he's met here, the kids that we've played with. It was mostly Americans or Ukrainian Campus Crusade staff, plus our babysitter and her son. Here are some photos!




What?

Danya: Do teenagers sometimes fall in love?

Me: Yes, they do. Your daddy and I fell in love with each other when we were teenagers.

Danya: [laughing] You and Daddy fell in love once?

Me: [laughing now] Yes! Is that funny?

Danya: Well, I knew you were good friends, but I never knew that you fell in love!

First Steps...

Mar 2 or 3--Standing very stable. Stands up from sitting. Can squat down, pick up even relatively heavy things and stand up holding them. (Then usually lifts them over her head to drop them behind her!)

Mar 3--Giggles and laughs when I ask her to walk to me, and stretches her hands in front of her, leaning to try to reach me. She usually falls, but one time she shuffled one step toward me.

Mar 4--At Mark and Jill Claxtons, she was playing with a castle about as high as her shoulder. When I said, "Come here, Ella." she stepped two steps from the castle to me. Then she giggled and fell into my shoulder. Later that same evening she tried to 'cut' a corner along a wall she was following. She took two or three steps away from the wall, then fell into the corner she was trying to reach.

Mar 7--She walks 3 steps to Eric, then throughout the day she does this again and again!

more to come, I'm sure...