With Danya... 
...and Tima
15 October 2007
Cousins
We have new nieces! Meredith Leigh (6 lbs 2 oz) and Adeline Dee (5 lbs 14 oz) were born Sept 28th to Dani and Dave. They are doing well, gaining weight like crazy (more than an ounce a day) and keeping their parents busy! You can see their photos at my sister’s blog: http://pointfiveseven.blogspot.com/ . We haven’t gotten to spend as much time with them as we would like, since our kids have had runny noses, and we don’t want to expose the newborns. But I sneak out every few days to go visit.
We are enjoying settling into a routine now that Eric’s home. I am really enjoying having Danya in kindergarten every day, and Tima in preschool two mornings a week. However, Ella hasn’t been napping well, so my dream of two-hours of rest on preschool days hasn’t been realized. But it’s still nice and quiet to have just her at home.
While enjoying the present, we are also looking to the future. Our move to
Our Korean teammates just moved into our apartment in
Tima
“I gave it to he, to Ella.”
“I can run so fastly.”
“That’s just pretendly.”
Grammar is so interesting, isn’t it?
Tima loves to wear shirts that button up. When he enters a room or any new situation, he pulls the collar down with both hands, showing off his collarbones. In his mind, he’s showing the Superman (or Incredibles) logo on his chest. Except, of course, he doesn’t have a superman costume on. So the effect is usually puzzling to those who don’t know about it. When Eric said, “Don’t do that, you’ll stretch your shirt out.” Tima replied, “But that what Incredible do.”
Tima started swimming lessons this week. At first, he told his teacher he wouldn’t put his face in the water. He would just lower his chin until it got wet. But by the end of the lesson, he was putting his head down and kicking and squirming forward. The teacher was so excited that she had him get back in the pool to show me after the lesson. (I wasn’t surprised, since he loves going underwater when we play at the pool, and even in the bathtub!)
Tima loves to pretend. He is always a superhero of one sort or another—usually Mr. Incredible or Dash. And after staying with friends who have dogs (Jeff and Amy Miller in Colo. Springs) he is now always crawling and barking. When I ask him to do something, he insists that I address him by his dog-name, either Mugs or Bear. “Mom, say, ‘Mugs, please get your shoes on!’” Or, he asks for us to play along: “Mom, say, ‘Danya, come and pet Mugs.’” This morning he was racing his cars and then got tired of being on hands and knees. He stood up and was flying the car around. “Lightning McQueen (the car) has super powers!”
Ella
We’ve finally finished a few weeks of fussiness, nasal congestion and resulting night-time feedings. At times, I thought she was empathizing with her newborn cousins. She’s still waking a few times at night, but usually can be resettled without feeding. However, her morning wake time is early—5:45 today. And I consider 6:30 sleeping in!
Tooth #6 erupted Oct 8. (She now has four bottom teeth and two top.)
Oct 7 – In the morning when Ella was fussy, Eric and the boys played pat-a-cake over and over with her. That evening, she started banging her half-closed fists together. The funnest thing is that she gets really excited when doing it. Now she initiates playing sometimes, calling out ‘ga-gay’ while banging her fists together. We debate whether she is actually imitating the ‘cake’ sound when she says “ga-gay”
That same evening, my mom was helping her wave good-bye, and Ella started to wave her other hand. She then would wave her hand whenever we said, “bye-bye.” Again, she was giggling and shrieking, so excited to be waving. The motion is very similar to when she’s clapping, and she is shy about showing either off in public.
Scooting around, lunging from all fours to reach out. She’s getting faster and faster. This morning I sat her in front of her toy in our room while I got ready. But three times I had to pull her away from the books magazines piled under the bed. And for the first time, she got into the boys’ toy box in the living room. We are still a little lost about what to do with some of their stuff…. I suppose we won’t take babyproofing too seriously until she actually starts getting into stuff. Somehow we think she just won’t do it!
Danya
Every day each family member shares ‘one-good-thing, one-bad-thing’ about their day. Danya’s good thing is almost always that he went to kindergarten, and his bad thing is often that he didn’t get to stay for a long day. He’s loving it. And learning a lot, both academically and socially.
At recess he plays football with a small group of kindergarten boys. One day some first graders were teasing them. As Danya says, “They were making fun of us, but we just laughed and ran away.” Another day, he told me how Nick used to like
Danya is also in swimming lessons, and doing well, having a lot of fun…and maybe learning something? He can swim about 3 thrashing strokes, until he has to take a breath. Then he stops.
Drawing—his pictures are becoming more and more sophisticated, with smaller people and more details. He no longer draws stick-men, but rather his people are formed with ovals or rectangles. The markers are almost always out, and we go through reams of paper these days, because Danya loves to draw and color. (In fact, all that high-school and college memorabilia makes great scrap paper, and interesting reading for the recipients, too!)
Images of September
Tima said goodbye to Daddy before his first day of preschool.
Ella learned to sit.
Ella learned to sit.
Danya met his third cousin in kindergarten.
Our nieces Meredith Leigh and Adeline Dee Coleman were born!
Sept 27, 2007
Since I last wrote, we had one week with Eric in Russia, and one week with him home. The last week of his trip was hard for me, as we all got colds, bad enough that Danya had to miss school one day. Tima was only sick for one day, and my sister babysat while I went to a morning bible study. It wasn’t too hard for her, though, since he slept 2 hours of the 3 I was gone! The kids recovered much faster than I did. Though I was never really sick, I didn’t feel well for about a week. Eric caught it within two days of returning, and that made our ‘re-entry’ difficult. It’s usually hard when he’s dealing with jet-lag and needing recovery from his schedule while gone. And I’m trying to recover from being a single-parent for a week. Add to that both of us not feeling well, and there were some hard days. But, I can’t believe he only arrived a week ago. For a few days now life has felt normal. This helps me to look forward to moving to Kiev, where Eric will take shorter trips, and have no jet-lag upon return! It sure is nice to be back together!
My sister has amazingly not given birth to her twins. Because the ‘first’ one is breech, she will have a c-section tomorrow! I am so excited to meet our new nieces. (In fact, I decided to write today, as I hope to spend a lot of time with them in the next few weeks!)
Here’s the update on our kids:
Danya
“One day at k Care, a whole bunch of girls were chasing me and trying to kiss me. And it was rough. Julianna, Natalie and Natalie’s friend.”
“Not Allie?”
“That was a different time.”
“Chichai helped me. One time I wanted John to help me. He speaks Spanish. He’s so strong, he would be like three boys. He’s five, but he’s so very strong. I’ve been asking him, I bet if he helped, a whole bunch of girls would start crying. He’s even stronger than me. Actually, he’s like four boys. I’m so strong, I’m just like two boys.”
“I don’t really want to help feed Ella, but I know that it will help you.” Danya has continued to be very helpful, and responds well when I tell the boys that I’m having a hard time doing everything. This is usually because I’m frustrated with Ella’s crying, or trying to get everyone’s food ready and on the table while Ella fusses. Danya switches his attitude and starts asking, “What else can I do to help you?” I appreciate the help, but I also worry that he’s trying to earn my favor over Tima. One day he was hardly eating because every time Ella fussed, he would go to entertain her. I finally told him to sit down and eat, and let me take care of Ella. I don’t want him to feel that he is a third parent. But I do need his help!
“At my preschool in Russia, nobody wanted to play with me.” I think that the contrast with his current kindergarten class has made him aware of the contrast to Russian preschool. We talked about this, and even about being scared about moving to Ukraine because it will be like Russia. It’s a good chance to learn to trust God with our needs, and let me tell you, I’m praying for good friends and school situations in Kiev! Danya is still loving kindergarten, learning a lot of words by sight, and bringing home a lot of new facts. He saw a very bright ‘star’ this morning, and went to get his library book, about planets. He told me that he wanted to “discover what that bright light” was. He’s full of information about tadpoles, frogs, clown fish and anemones! (His school is a math/science focus school, so he goes to science lab every week, and there’s a lot incorporated even into his reading curriculum.)
Ella-
If I can say anything about Ella’s emerging personality, it would be that she’s quite sensitive to noise. She startles easily, which we’ve noticed since she was about one month old. Once when she was in the highchair, I coughed. She started crying, and never calmed down. Sometimes, when a stranger looks at her, she bursts into tears. But most times, she smiles right back. Her ‘stranger anxiety’ is also becoming stronger… she cries when I leave the room, and notices when I say ‘goodbye’. When she’s fussy in others’ arms, she’ll calm down when I take her. (I know that sounds normal, but I felt that the boys never really noticed who I was until later! Ella has been calmed by me since she was a few months old.)
5th tooth 9/16 (surprise! Another one--bottom R)
Green beans- 9/15 liked well from the start even though they must be the grossest looking baby food. Will eat them and other veggies straight now, though reacts better if I start off with some mixed w rice cereal
Oatmeal- 9/19 Real oats. She kind of gagged on the texture. When mixed with sweet potatoes, she ate it okay. The second day I mashed it a little more, but she didn’t take it so well.
9/17 carrots as finger food, cooked soft and cut into chunks. She played with them some, I don’t think she put any in her mouth.
9/19, I gave her sweet potato chunks and she actually tasted some when I held them to her lips. She seemed to like it, but hasn’t gotten the idea of how to get them from her tray to her mouth. When I feed her them with a spoon, she’s very interested. It’s a good way to calm her down when she’s fussy at the table.
Her reflux seems just as bad as ever, perhaps worse. I’ve realized that she is very sensitive to caffeine. Her symptoms are not like when she was a newborn. Now, I can tell she’s having problems when she chokes a lot while feeding, coughs a lot after feeding, and is generally fussy. We’ve increased her medicine as she’s grown, and I’m wondering if I need to take her to the doctor again before her regular check-up, which is still 2 months away. I want to test her dairy sensitivity, but every time I think of it, she gets fussy for other reasons (teeth, sickness) or her reflux seems to be bothering her (caffeine)? The one day I accidentally had cheese in a meal, she was very fussy later, her reflux seemed much worse. But there are so many days when I don’t know the ‘trigger’ that I’m not sure it was from the dairy.
When she’s on her belly, she pushes up to her toes. But starting 9/15, she was actually on her knees instead of toes. 9/20, she was spending a lot of time there, rocking, and somehow moving herself backwards. She only seems to do this when she’s fussy, so I don’t usually leave her there long. She still often scoots herself off of her blanket, especially when there’s something that she wants! There’s no real method, but she just somehow seems to move.
Tima
“Th-th-th-th” There is a small motor running in our house all the time. Eric thinks it sounds like the machine-gun noise, but quieter. It took him only a few hours at home to ask, “Tima, why are you always making that noise?” I’ve been asking for days. He also seems to have an abundance of saliva. I remember when Danya went through a stage like that; I was worried he had some disease because he ws always slurping saliva back into his mouth. It seems to have resolved itself, so I’m hoping Tima’s will, too. But the percussive th-th-th-th doesn’t help him keep it all in!
On the pronunciation front, Tima’s ‘s’ sounds are becoming more and more common. And he is really exploring a lot of new words and phrases. One of my favorites is the word ‘none’ used incorrectly. “I don’t have none of those toys.” “We have none time left.”
“Mom, watch me. Mom, want to feel my muscles? Mom, watch this. Mom, help me.” I feel that Tima is an attention sponge, and is always a little dry. It was hardest when Danya was sick, as Tima seemed to get especially needy. He was upset that I was giving any attention to Danya. Also, when we do ‘homework’ Tima demands attention constantly. Danya doesn’t need as much, but as soon as I turn away to help Danya with anything, Tima starts interrupting and complaining.
The boys are continuing to play well together, making up games and activities. They love playing, “Lion King” and various super-hero games, which involve a lot of running, jumping, tackling and ‘dying’. Tima often makes a grand entrance, jumping and landing with legs wide apart, arms extended and cries out, “Batman!”
He and Danya also are fighting a lot. One day they were together upstairs while I was cooking, and I heard Tima crying. I decided to wait, and sure enough, in a few minutes they both come down the stairs, wailing. Tima wanted more of the little disks they were shooting, so he started pushing Danya. Then Danya kicked Tima’s toys over. Then Tima whacked him with the plastic gun. That’s the typical scenario. I was just happy that Tima hadn’t bitten Danya. (Can I blame the violence on letting them play with toy guns?)
Tima still loves to help me around the house, especially when it’s just the two of us. He helps with laundry, food prep, dishes, and loves to scrub the sink. We clean bathrooms and mirrors while Danya is at school, and Tima likes to help vacuum with the lightweight vacuum. However, when I need help to get a meal on the table, or when I ask both boys to clean up, Tima is very resistant. He is not listening well. But it is hard to know, as sometimes I think he doesn’t understand my instructions—like the day I was saying to put something on the rug by the door, and he was milling around the door, seeming to not know what the ‘rug’ was. So I can’t tell if he doesn’t understand or just didn’t pay attention. But there are enough times that I know he understands that I am usually confident that he just didn’t listen. After giving him the benefit of the doubt for weeks and repeating myself over and over, I’ve finally decided to start punishing him even if I can tell he didn’t listen and has no idea what I expect. We’ll see if this works to teach him to actually pay attention.
My dad bought some new markers for the boys, some with scents. When I got home, he constantly had me smell them and guess what the scent is. Then he tells me what he thinks it is.
From my mom after babysitting that day:
I had a great time with Tima. He's such a different person when Danya isn't around (and somewhat when you aren't there, too).
Today he was so grown up. It was funny when he told me about the play dough, the brown being Danya's and the blue his. He got Danya's out and wanted to play with it, but when I said "No" he was very accepting. He told me Danya got a new poem today, and that he (Tima) had a poem, too. He said his was in the cabinet, and then got out that spiral preschool book where he had to pick out the things that were different in each row and put an x on them. He said that was his poem (he must have meant homework). He showed me the spiral thing and explained all the directions and then did it. Everyone he did was correct, and then he colored all over everything. Oh, did you notice the marker set [that my dad bought] had 5 pens that were scented? Tima noticed it first because he wondered why those 5 were black and the others white. That's how he got marker on his nose and lip, by smelling them.
Tima calls any homework or preschool activities his ‘poem’ because Danya’s homework everyday is a poem to memorize. The two words are synonymous in Tima’s mind. (He has also memorized all the kindergarten poems. Too bad we won’t be here…he’d be way ahead!) Everyday when Danya works on his poem, Tima works on a preschool book. He has surprised me with his ability to follow directions and do the similar/different activities. But any ‘word’ activities, even picking out rhyming words, seems too much. He does occasionally make up rhymes, though, substituting words in songs or poems that rhyme with the original. Speaking of songs, Tima has really learned some songs. Head-shoulder-knees-and-toes and the alphabet song are his favorite. “I just can’t wait to be king,” from the movie “The Lion King,” is also a popular one. He loves saying pat-a-cake to Ella (and it really calms her down, just like it did Tima at that age). And one of the books we have from the library he has just about memorized, and loves to say the words. His favorite books are “Where the Wild Things Are” and “Teremok” (Russian fairy tale). Eric bought some fun books when he was in St. Pete, and Tima is often requesting me to read it. He loves to count, so we count the animals in Russian. And he’s actually attempting to repeat them! That’s exciting, since he’s been pretty negative about anything in Russian.
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